Ever been in a tight spot? Pretty sure everybody has, at least, whatever each of us considers to be a tight spot!
Another question; ever been pretty happy at work and your environment but what you are doing does not earn you enough to care for your bills (housing, party, parents, etc)? Maybe not everybody has experienced that but I have.
And what do you do in such a situation? Well, you would probably, inform your boss that you are broke and he should fill your pocket with some coins. What if he doesnt? Well, you leave him the way he is and get on to find another job that can satisfy you. That quite sums up everything that has happened to me at my workplace this year.
Am happy to have setup the networks that i have, trained communities, learnt different local languages, partied and mixed with as many community people and organisations as i possibly could. But all in all, it never takes away the ever nagging feeling that you dont have enough money to pay your bills, at least, not by yourself - you depend on someone else on doing it for you - like you are hand-capped! God made us strangely, each of us loves the nice feeling of doing a job and at the end of the day getting paid for it, at least, the agreed amount. It becomes complicated when you have to tell somebody every now and then about what you want to do, as though, you not old enough to make personal decisions!
This kind of behaviour makes you think of another job with hope that it will come with financial independence with no questions on how you want to spend what you earn but only as long as you get the boss' work done! I should say this is a had decision to make, considering, you are leaving behind something that you have seen grow from almost nothing to an east african model, being so attached to colleagues & the local people, the network already set up with other community organizations allover east africa etc. But be as it may, when you finally throw in the towel, you realize that you got some independence and freedom - from everyday tasks - and your mind begins to work a little more too; especially, on where you have to earn your next crust of bread!
Well, spending time learning more about community development in Tanzania, has made me relate more with the rural poor enough preparation to rhythm well with my own career. Am out to set up as many community networks as i can; its always handy to know how to handle and network with the rural folk. The approach towards a rural person should be different from the way you would handle one from an urban area. In the urban area, we take so many things for granted, sometimes, we think they are obvious to everyone around us! At least, i have the skills necessary in handling such a situation.
enough of my thoughts...